Since I was a high school student, I had been as an English teacher’s assistant for three years. My high school English teacher is a perfectionist; consequently, I had to do better than other teacher’s assistants. In the beginning, I didn’t want to be the assistant of that teacher. There were two reasons why I didn’t want to accept the job. First, one of the qualifications for students to be that English teacher's helper was to have strong responsibility and great ability to manage events. Therefore, I was afraid I couldn’t do the job as well as them. Second, they were good at English very well; hence, I though I didn’t have enough ability to be as an assistant. However, after I considered these problems, I decided to accept the challenge even if the job would be a little difficult.
In the period of being teacher’s assistant, I had encountered some frustrations and had much pressure. For instance, I had to get great grade; otherwise, teacher would blame me. Once, I got a fail in an English exam. In class, I was blamed for fail in an English exam in front of the classmates. At the moment, I felt very sad and wanted to cry to vent my emotion. After class, I couldn’t hide my emotion and cry. My friends tried to comfort me. After that I thought it over. I considered that I got the bad grade because I didn’t study hard. After I experienced the frustration, I understand to be an English teacher’s assistant, I should get better grade than other classmates.
To be an assistant, I learn how to manage different events and how to be a leader to lead other people.
Hi Penny,
回覆刪除Again, this piece is quite good, too. =D
尤其是第一段，組織好，文意清楚，而且linking words用得很好。除了一兩句有文意上需要修正, 還有小部份的時態沒有用對
第二段有用到較多的time order words, 也是用得很合宜
1. My English teacher is a perfectionist; consequently, I had to do better than other teacher’s assistants.
==>需要註明: My high school English teacher...
2. In the beginning, I didn’t want to be an English teacher’s assistant.
==>...這一句較不清楚，因為是指你不想當任何英文老師的助理(那就用any English teacher's assitant), 還是你前面提的那位完美主義者(那就用指定the assistant of that teacher)。an English teacher's assistant是看不出來的
3. There are two reasons why I didn’t want to accept the job.
==>are用過去式
4. First, persons who once were to be assistants of my English teacher have strong responsibility and have great ability to manage many events.
==>我想把這一句改成: First, one of the qualifications for students to be that English teacher's helper was to have strong responsibility and great ability to manage events.
5. Therefore, I’m afraid I couldn’t do the job as well as them.
==>am時態不對
6. Second, they are good at English very well; hence, I though I didn’t have enough ability to as an assistant.
==>are 時態
==> to as an assistant少了動詞
7. However, after I considered these problems, I decided to accept the challenge even if the job would be a little difficult.
==>Good!
8.In the period of being teacher’s assistant, I had encountered some frustrations and had much pressure.
==>...being the teacher's...
9. For instance, I had to get great grade; otherwise, teacher would blame me. Once, I got a fail in English exam.
==>exam是可數名詞, 要用an English exam
10. In class, I was blamed for fail in English exam in front of classmates.
==>in front of the classmates
==> exam的問題如上
11. At the moment, I felt sad extremely and wanted to cry to vent my emotion.
==>I felt very sad...
12. After that I thought it over,
==>After that, I thought it over.
13. I considered that I got the worse grade because I didn’t study hard.
==>...I got the bad grade...